The Corrupt-a-Wish Game

[3.14]

It's a forum game. Let's play...Please try not to post that much or else.....
Anyways here's how you play.

One person wishes, the next person grants and corrupts to their own liking, then makes a wish of their own.

For example:

"I wish I had a car."


"Granted. It's the car from Stephen King's Christine.

I wish for world peace."


"Granted. World peace is achieved by uniting the world against you.

I wish for the secret of happiness."


"Granted. You are hit by a bus.

I wish for immortality."



Anyways, that's how it works. Now I need a good one to start us off...


Ah!

I wish for a teleportation machine.

[CaviosDaryll]

Granted. The teleportation machine activates by opening temporarily opening a black hole, forcing you through its singularity, and spitting you out a (now-existent) wormhole.

I wish for more wishes.

[Shock]

Granted. Santa Claus's mailing address has been permanently changed to your own.

I wish I could travel around the world.

[HyperX]

Granted. The cannon is on your front lawn.

I wish I had a better computer.

[KDS]

Granted. A 100% discount coupon of the nearest computer store appears in your store room.
I wish I had a T3 internet connection.

[Horn]

Sure thing! Arnold Schwarzenegger now permanently occupies your computer, hissing at you whenever you try to approach it.

I'd like a refill, please.

[Charybdizs]

I gave you a refill. Of more beer. You had already had 8 tankards of it, and now you passed out onto the floor, where a bartender tripped over you, and sued you for the damage done when he fell on a few tables.

I wish I could shape-shift.

[CaviosDaryll]

Granted! Of course, you should have added "whatever you wanted." You can only transform into things without chemicals or moving parts; also, for animal-shifting it can be any variety... of BALLOON animal; finally, the other objects you can transform into have to be something your grandmom have knitted you.

I wish to be Powerlord! NO, Yaginuma.

[DrZaius]

Granted! You are now an ex-figure skater from Japan who is now working as a figure skate commentator.

...Have fun with that.

Oh I wish, I wish I hadn't killed that fish.

[HyperX]

Granted. Terry Jones slapped you with it instead.

I wish for a Klondike bar.

[CaviosDaryll]

Granted! It is the most delicious Klondike bar you- nay, the WORLD has ever tasted. It is absolutely perfect. It is just at that right temperature so the consistency of it is nice, it isn't melting too much, but at the same time it's not so cold that it hurts your teeth. Its very existence is beautiful. And it brings a tear to your eye. And then more, as you realize that you could never again eat a Klondike bar knowing that all of them would taste like dirt in comparison.

Oh I wish, I wish, I wish, oh I wish, I wish I didn't fall off my bike the other day.

[X]

Granted, and now as a result, a schism formed itself in the depths of reality and ripped a hole in the very fabric of time and space. I hope you're happy!

I wish someone would invent a good nose-picking device.

[Charybdizs]

Granted! A certain man by the name of Gerald Michelson invented a robot. When it is implanted in your nose, it uses a delicate claw, to clean all the snot out of your nose and feed it into your mouth. Non-Stop. There is no off button.


I wish I had a Ham+Cheese Sandwich.

[Teck]

Granted~ However there is no mayonnaise on your sandwich, so you rush to the store to get some mayonnaise, but you didn't have enough money, so you started to run to your friend's house so you could ask to borrow some money, thus buying the mayonnaise you so desperately wanted, allowing you to enjoy your Ham and Cheese sandwich to the fullest extent. But then just before you got to the front door, a piano fell on your head. Because you're dumb.

And for the record...

I'd like a refill, please.

That wasn't even a wish. ):/

I wish I still had my old copy of Majora's Mask.

[Shock]

Granted. But your copy of the game has been damaged and your N64 will not read it.

I wish I had a better job.